Earlier this week (Monday, the 18th), I found out that my best bud, my 8 year old chocolate Lab had cancer.
We had just had a tumor removed from his mouth and the biopsy result told us that he had malignant canine melanoma. Our vet couldn't even spit it out directly.
That night...I came home and there he was wagging his big ol' tail so hard is whole body was swaying. He was a little woozy from the meds from the surgery, but he was all there...My Duke.
Later on that night, after everyone had gone to sleep, we went for our nightly walk. He had a spring in his step. Probably because he didnt have that damn tumor in his mouth. When we got home, I hugged that big stinky dog...and cried.
I promised him I'd find a way to fight with him through this. But honestly, I still don't know what the hell I can do. I don't want chemo, or radiation therapy. I don't want to make his life worse. But then again, I don't want him to suffer at all...I don't want him to know pain....I don't want him to slowly decline.
There's a vaccine out there that helps to keep the cancer at bay somewhat, but I'm at a point where I couldn't even fully pay the vet for the surgery. Hell, I'm living paycheck to paycheck just trying to support the Family, never mind being able to afford this vaccine.
But what kind of owner would I be to let my buddy suffer...Fuck, I don't know what to do.
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Friday, June 8, 2012
bestbud (1 of 1)
My bestie Duke. Now officially a "senior" dog at the ripe old age of 8. Still, he's a big goofball and suprisingly tolerant of the Yorkie pup the Woman picked up.
He's got a bad toof...gotta get to the vet soon for that...
Thursday, May 24, 2012
So its been more than 30 days since all the shit started to hit the fan. My so called professional career won't ever be the same, but more importantly, I've learned that you really can't trust anyone in life, except for yourself.
I haven't really been able to talk to anyone about the shit that's been going on...been keeping it bottled up mostly. I'm at the point where I don't trust anyone to "get" what I'm going through.
And that's just with the stuff at the day job. Nevermind the personal stuff....
I haven't really been able to talk to anyone about the shit that's been going on...been keeping it bottled up mostly. I'm at the point where I don't trust anyone to "get" what I'm going through.
And that's just with the stuff at the day job. Nevermind the personal stuff....
Friday, April 20, 2012
touch
There's a lot of shit raining on me right now....but the only thing I can think of is how much I actually miss touch...
Like, when the Boy was younger...he'd hold my hand out of course when we'd go out. It was cute...and it, in some very small way, made me feel connected to him. He's grown too *old* for that at age 8...but he does still take my hand when we walk around the city....or even when we walk the dog.
Such a small gesture...
Like, when the Boy was younger...he'd hold my hand out of course when we'd go out. It was cute...and it, in some very small way, made me feel connected to him. He's grown too *old* for that at age 8...but he does still take my hand when we walk around the city....or even when we walk the dog.
Such a small gesture...
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Thursday, April 12, 2012
IMG_0204.jpg
Whatever other bullshit I'm dealing with...the thing I'm gonna take from today is...
we had a good day.
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